Estelle Goh
CHIJ Secondary TP
ijestelle@hotmail.com
MSN/FB/Friendster

1. Improve and sharpen my Dance Techniques
2. Book Vouchers, so that I can buy lots' of em
3. Pick up a new skill during the holidays
4. Spend more time with God
5. Carolling with the Llamas again!
6. Picnics, sleepovers, shopping with the Sixsomes & Llamas
7. Catching up time with friends
8. Christmas with the folks in malaysia
9. Become a better person

August 2007
September 2007
October 2007
November 2007
December 2007
January 2008
February 2008
March 2008
April 2008
May 2008
September 2008
October 2008
November 2008
December 2008
January 2009
February 2009

designer x-emergencyexit
resources xx

My psycho conversation with Zena @ 4.02am

zena; NANNYTAN! 说:
what's up stellestellestellestellestelle
zena; NANNYTAN! 说:
i'm kinda hungry now.
zena; NANNYTAN! 说:
after all that laughing.
stelle (: 说:
i just ate sausages WOW
zena; NANNYTAN! 说:
):
stelle (: 说:
you know sausages WOW
zena; NANNYTAN! 说:
wanna send flying pigs here to give me some?
zena; NANNYTAN! 说:
hahaha.
stelle (: 说:
fry an egg yourself :D
stelle (: 说:
fry 2!
zena; NANNYTAN! 说:
hahaha.
stelle (: 说:
the other one, u go and put it on your maid's face WOW
zena; NANNYTAN! 说:
HAHAHA!
stelle (: 说:
hahaha omelette facial mask
zena; NANNYTAN! 说:
mean ass.
stelle (: 说:
egg has collagen!
stelle (: 说:
the oil can make her dry face smooth again
zena; NANNYTAN! 说:
HAHAHA!
stelle (: 说:
then when she wake up, " AHHHHHH MAMMMM! GHOST GHOST!! "
zena; NANNYTAN! 说:
HAHAHA!
stelle (: 说:
yellow ghost!
zena; NANNYTAN! 说:
HAHAHA
stelle (: 说:
oh sheesh im laughing like crap now
zena; NANNYTAN! 说:
me too.
zena; NANNYTAN! 说:
hahaha.
zena; NANNYTAN! 说:
thanks to you & your egg facial mask.
stelle (: 说:
hahahaha!
stelle (: 说:
im gonna upload this convo
zena; NANNYTAN! 说:
eh.
zena; NANNYTAN! 说:
not cool stelle, not cool.
zena; NANNYTAN! 说:
hahaha.
zena; NANNYTAN! 说:
stelle, why is your blog still not updated at this time/
zena; NANNYTAN! 说:
?
stelle (: 说:
because i need to fry eggs for my dad's facial mask
zena; NANNYTAN! 说:
HAHAHA!@
zena; NANNYTAN! 说:
of course you have to stelle, of course.
stelle (: 说:
I have a role to play, as a filial daughter my friend.
zena; NANNYTAN! 说:
i understand man
stelle (: 说:
SHUDDDDUUUPPPP
zena; NANNYTAN! 说:
what?
zena; NANNYTAN! 说:
fine.
zena; NANNYTAN! 说:
i'll shutup.
zena; NANNYTAN! 说:
):
stelle (: 说:
WHY DID YOU TAKE MY KAYA!
zena; NANNYTAN! 说:
huh?
zena; NANNYTAN! 说:
i don't get what you're saying.
stelle (: 说:
last night, u said kay ah, then u took my kaya
zena; NANNYTAN! 说:
last night?
zena; NANNYTAN! 说:
i was at the band concert, playing, seeing you'll?
zena; NANNYTAN! 说:
stelle, i think i better send flying pigs to your house to fly you to the mental hospital.
zena; NANNYTAN! 说:
i've already helped you enter your name in.
zena; NANNYTAN! 说:
just go get admitted.
stelle (: 说:
HAHAHAHAHA
stelle (: 说:
HAHAHAHAHA OMG
stelle (: 说:
you are so mean to me.
stelle (: 说:
my heart is breaking into a million pieces


updates later!

dance to express, not to impress..

Dance Farewell yesterday was a smashing success I must say. Although it came off a little disorganised but in the end we managed to work together as an ensemble! :D:D The theme was
Sleepover @ The Jungle, and the seniors had to come dressed in those costume, and you know what? THEY LOOKED FABULOUS (: We had the whole fashion parade thing, pole dancing hahaha, then dinner was potluck, after watching the farewell video everyone was already in the i-am-going-to-cry mood, it ended off with touch time, where the seniors all shared their experiences throughout their journey in IJ Dance Ensemble, and how it has evolved from the sucky old attitude and bitchiness from their generation's seniors, while now we're all as one family.
There was a tinge of sadness within me, how we've grown so much, with all the wonderful guidance they've offered us along this never easy path. Haha, our own cheesy quote:
" Through blisters we bind" hahahaha, dumb luh seriously but hilarious.
Sometimes I just wished that they never have to go, stay with us and continue to rub off their vibe on everyone. It's going to be a whole new Dance Ensemble next year, different atmostphere, different people coming in and many new challenges to face. I was just watching the SYF 2007 Gold & Gold with Honours DVD , boy they were hell good. We're all aiming for a Gold with Honours because last year's Silver was well you could say, a disappointment.
I think all of us want it really badly, seeing that effort that each one of us put in, and how we withstand Zaki's (WOOHOO) ;D
CELESTIAL! GOLD WITH HONOURS!
i'm going to be away at camp again! HAHA, till the 29th, Zena's awesome concert day.
It's at the Catholic Youth Ardiocesan Centre, never been there before but it should be A-oh-kay.
I'm reading for weekday mass tonight! It's gonna be like debut man.
I'm having the jitters, but I pray that it'll flow smoothly.
ALLELUIA! God answered my prayers, I was finding for tickets for the Lourdes Experience in the Singapore Indoor Stadium, but no one had extra and I was a little disappointed, but Denise managed to get tickets!! :D YAY YAY GOD IS GOOD, ALL THE TIME.

how can life be so fragile?
how can life be so unpredictable?
how can things happen so suddenly?

just earlier, heard from zena that shannen got into a severe car accident ):
and it was a drink driving case..... she's in a bad condition now ):
and it all happened immediately after her confi camp.
pray for her darlings.

thanks.

It's God's Will.

Hello!
today's sucha tiring and exhausting day, because I slept at 4 the previous night.
We had syf with Zaki and he gave us these new combinations, super niceeeeee!
you know when you dance with the song, whoa you'll get those kind of hyped up feelings!
I'm feeling really inspired, and we're all aiming for a Gold with Honours, I strongly believe
that we'll definitely make it! :D Visualise. Pioritise. Actualise.
so Ms Wee's class after that was cancelled because she was very sick ): , decided to join
the Denise and all at Suntec, met Stephen at TP , yup yup yup, there were 13 of us together you know! That's like considered a gang already. We watched Beverly Hills Chihuahua, whoa it was extremely funny watching with the churchies because everyone's like jester-ish, always laughing and making stupid jokes. Brandon's laughter was classic man, the high pitched kind of laughter like a girl. I was freeeeezing in the theatres!! After which we went to Carrefour because the guys wanted ribs *wink wink* HAHA, it's an inside joke. Yeah, then bused to Gardens for dinner at the market and that was like already around 8.30 :/ Everyone's mood was like rock low, because we were all so drained and dying, haha a day of solid fun and laughter. Went home with Ronald, haha he totally lightened my mood by so much, gahhh and that boy's going to Tokyo & USA until next year ): No one to send me home late at night already. Hahaha, God is with me so never mind! Tomorrow's gonna be a busy day i know, and I'm gonna need all the energy but my body is reluctant to sleep just yet. In fact I'm actually craving for Macdonalds :/ hahaha.
Yay, YMC & BASIC!'s organising a Youth Christmas Outreach event! ;D
okay my mind is just thinking of the macgriddles or cheeseburger's meat patties.
AHHHHHHHHHH. I cant get it outta my head, should I just walk to macs and get it?
HAHA, fattening shit.


okay okay, goodnight honeys, till some other dayyy

I MISS YOU JANET. sorry for not spending much time lately ):

Gello everyone (:
Everyday I pray for, and do something different
it is my holiday resolution, to try something new each day.
:D
Served 7am mass with Bel for Gift Bearers, whoa it's been sucha long long time since I attended
7am due to the exams, commitment issues and fatigue. How does it feel to be back to serve?
Different. Different from the past. It felt like a clean start, like we were starting everything all over again on a fresh sheet of paper. After mass, met up with Maryanne and Ronald while waiting for the slow poky Max to change out of his cassock. Breakfast with Jon, Gareth and Shaun was ultra gay, as in literally the gay gay way. Haha some people just seem natural when they get in touch with their feminine ways. Then later Kristian came along with Stephen, went to macs, and to the barber where the 3 of them decided to cut their hair (: Hung around gardens just talking and hanging out, until Maryanne had to go for her Grandma's bday lunch, and Kris had to buy his shoes, leaving me to pimp with the 3 guys. Haha, and they managed to convince me to play LAN, HAHA funny shit really. We played CS, hahaha super retarded I kept shooting without looking at the red aiming thingy. After LAN, met up with the churchies for luncchh at Cartel! Another sick session man, Shawn and Stephen were in the same cubicle, of which Shawn tried to violate Stephen. Thank heavens I'm a girl. Ice Cube next, saw Tim Soo & Tim Swee outside so they joined us tooooooo (: We left around 3.30-4? Bused to toa payoh to meet my mummy and then it was back home again. I was damn shacked after that, plus to top it off it was going to rain, my mood was super horrendous..
I have been pimping for the past 3 consecutive days, HAHA I'm sucha pimp.
;D but it was really nice to spend time with the churchies.
I think everyone was emotional today at 6 plus, nut, clarice, me.
but my Lord calmed my mind :D
tomorrow's council camp, and I'm dreading it because I wouldnt be able to attend weekday mass for 3 days ): plus I've not packed at all.
i hope i survive.

" Friends are the siblings that God forgot to give us"

I find myself strongly agreeing with this quote and I'm sure do others too, these few days have been pretty fast-pacing yet fulfilling. Firstly, thank you so much for the people who've read my previous blog posts and sent me lovely encouraging messages, you guys are so important to me and what you've said would help me go the extra mile in finding out who God is to me and who I am.
I promised some that I'll blog post about them, one of which is Anna (:
Anna is a special person because before camp I didnt like her as I succumbed to peer pressure into believing all those gossips about her. But as they always say, never to judge a book by it's cover, through this whole week, I could see the other side of her the positive one, which envelopes her personality and she was honestly far from what the gossips said, FAR FAR from it. Inside she's kept with lots of troubles from school, from home, from friends and yet she still has the strength to put up a strong front so that she would not have to affect the people around her. I can feel that perky energy when I'm with her, be it during mass, dinner or just a simple conversation, it's like she can bring out the best in me. I'm so glad that we've both became closer and that I love her so much like a friend! :D and she said she loves meee too!!

While pimping with the guys for the whole day, I realised this funny bit about their friendships.
You know girl's friendships are normally all warm and fuzzy but they do not always come out genuine and real, whereas in guy's friendship you are able to feel that level of sincerity in them, be it just a simple hi 5 or a grab around the neck.... This is something I have to learn from, to be as sincere as I can be in anything that I do (: Walking home on a late Saturday night makes me feel extremely jubilant for some reason, I guess it's the light talks and silly jokes.
Thanks R! :D

a perennial problem has just been sparked off my life:
events clashing on the same day, same time. = dilemma = choose one = disappointment.

oh wells.

Good morning,
this morning I woke up to a very enlivening dream, I dreamt that I was in South Africa on a mission trip to spread the word of God, but people were trying to kill me in all sorts of way, but there was always this voice telling me that If God is for us, who can be against us? , it was ringing over and over in my head but I could not put a picture to that voice, and I felt so trapped in that world.
Then suddenly I just opened my eyes, I was back into my own green room with an environment less alike South Africa, that was all a dream... What was the message actually?
Which is why I felt the need to blog, today's a light and easy day without any plans or errands to run except just spending some time in church and mass and d.o. I like my days to be like today, rainy, serene, away from the city district, just to spend time with myself and reflect on a couple of things. I love my life very much right now, it is the kind that I want to lead my entire life with.
I have learnt to love myself, for who I am and who I am not, it does not matter what I look like, which class I am in or my worldly ambitions because if I do not accept myself as the temple of God, who is he to accept me? Sometimes when reality hits between the eyes, in that moment do we realise that we live in such a profane world, where idolatry and adulation revolves around material wants, what happened? I find myself being a slave before, to everything I own and I would like to share with you that you will come to a point in time where you will lose all your energy till you find no utter meaning in those things. It is hard for everyone, for me, for you to be adamant in our walks of faith because along the way, there would be trials and tribulations put forward to us to face, but I know that deep inside my heart, God will never never ever forsake me and that he is carrying me all the time. I clearly remember what someone has told me before and only now does it all make sense. Isn't salvation amazing? Yes, the power of salvation by God is the only thing that can save us from final damnation.
This is something that I read while surfing the net that I find myself agreeing with,

that Jesus Christ had fulfilled three functions on Earth, that He therefore really saved mankind from sins and its consequences. As teacher He established the reign of truth; as king He supplied strength to His subjects; as priest He stood between heaven and earth, reconciling sinful man with his angry God

I thank God for letting me read this and to share this with you who's reading it.


The road to having a more intimate relationship with God is going to be hard and I am ready to
commission myself to his works and I will try my very best to cling onto you O Lord, and may you lead me by the hand and guide me into the everlasting shine of your love. Thank you again for blessing me with the gift of wisdom to understand so many things during mass for the past 3 days....

Without you, I am nothing.
I love you God (: you put a smile on my face! :D

open the eyes of my heart Lord,
open the eyes of my heart,
I want to see you, I want to see you

Yes I am back from church camp, and I am going to tell you that I was so foolish to have not
looked forward to it. The 7-9 Nov were the 3 most life-changing days I experienced with my Lord,
the days where I left all my wordly possessions ( handphone, ipod, laptop, msn ) aside just to come away and spend some time with him. God has been working in me for the past 3 days, through those tears of sorrow and happiness... It's when the mask of yours that you've been wearing for so long gets taken down, only then, do you feel the raw intensity of misery, anguish, agony, affliction, heartache and whatever just break away. I'm not good with words and haha my proficiency in language aint as good as some people, but I know in my heart that the Lord has left me;
Breathless. Complete . Loved . Stirred .
these 4 words just describe my relationship with him now. I feel his strong presence burning
so strong within me, it's like overwhelming my soul (:
It's like suddenly all else dont matter, except HIM AND HIM ALONE, you dont need that extra someone just to back you up when you need some affirmation, because you HAVE HIM, AND AS LONG AS I CLING ONTO HIM, HE WILL BE THERE FOR ME. To guide me, at every step of the way... And I have a new role model, and that would be the Pope, you know why?
The Pope is an amazing man, he's God's chosen disciple in this century, and why I admire him is because he is able to reach out and communicate with both the rich and the poor's heart.
How many of us have that ability?
Earlier this day, I was out with my friends and I was already planning to leave early for mass,
but the rain came pouring down, causing a major jam, I took a cab to church and during that whole journey, it just nerve-wrecked my brain. It was 15 mins to 6.30 and I was still stuck in a heavy congested jam in the middle of Braddell and Serangoon, the meter on the taxi was jumping sky high at every minute and I was panicking like crazy. I just felt that strong need to attend mass and even if it meant that when I reach, Father says Amen. And so, I prayed really fervently that the traffic would just quicken it's speed and hopefully I'll reach there in time.
Although this never happened, I spent my 30mins with God in the taxi. The uncle who was driving was God! (: Bizarre I know! But it really felt like God was with me striking up a conversation about my day and why I was so frantic. The Lord eventually still has his ways of calming my heart down. I didn't attend mass because I was too late, but I attended D.O, which stands for Divine Office. Go google it, I am not going to explain it here, be an inquisitive person.
Anyways, I am going to officially commit myself to daily mass and Divine Office from today,
12 November 2008, 9.20pm, with all my heart and all my faith, and I want you who's reading this to witness this for me. I love you Lord.
I am going to be a part of the Lectors' Ministry too (: this is really making me spiritually complete.
okay let me sidetrack for a while, you know my mum feels weird to have me home after the camp, because she says that my behaviour sorta freaks her out a bit, in a good way though.
As last night, she was doing her ever-so-duh duties as a mother to nag at my dirty messy room expecting me to either give an uninterested look or procrastinate. But I didn't do any of that!
I smiled and said okay (: Got to work today, cleaned up half of room ,emptied all my shelves, that I shocked her when she came home! harhar, this are her exact words:
" Estelle, as much as I love how much you've listened to my advices, your enthusiasm is freaking me out a bit, first, you are so simple , you dont ask me for pocket money because you say you find no need in having any, then you clean up your room and bought all the things I wanted from the grocer. Are you okay?"
HAHA, hey have I been that bad before? Actually no I havent, it's just that I understand things from a better perspective now because I see God in everyone! :D so if I love God, I shouldnt fight with him (mummy) or ask him for money -.- which kinda haha.
alright, I dont think I wanna share any more of the heartfelt encounters with God here.
goodnight peeps.

You're Indescribable, uncontainable.

left right left right
i feel like my head is winding from left to right, left to right.
this is the withdrawal symptoms from not cycling for a long period of time.
I cant walk or sit down properly also HAHA cause it's like _________, YA.
( you get it? )
TODAY WAS 2/8's CLASS GATHERING @ East Coast Park!
Initially there were lost sheeps scattered all over, but we found our way to the pit 41D :)
lugging all our beehoon, fishballs and bottled drinks on the double rider bike, it was super challenging to balance! I rode it with Ru, because I personally don't know how to cycle.
Sing-alongs and pictures were really :D I'm still winding!! HAHA HOW.
tomorrow's church camp, so I'm gonna be away for 3 days until Sunday, but I haven't packed
yet because I just got home :/

Yesterday was streaming results day, haha I wasnt really very excited neither was I very sad.
Hahaha, out of the Sixsomes, only Lynette, Melissa, Grace and me are in the same class, while Janet and Jacq went to different classes. Jang's 3/5, we're 3/6, and Jacq's in 3/7 ;D So hopefully our classes are next to each other, that way we'll still be in touch! YAY! Hahaha aiyoh, physics chem. Anyways it's time for me to bathe and pack so adios till Monday! :D

loves

you know sometimes I just wished that my thoughts could be blogged, because it has more of the personal touch, rather than typing it out.
but that way the whole world would be able to read what you're thinking...
hahaha okay maybe we could add in a few limitations to control this.

there are a couple of things lately that I can't seem to figure, what exactly my heart
and mind wants. I'm always sitting on the fence...
day after tomorrow's the release of streaming results, i really wanna see which class i get into.
oh hooos, look at what time's it now. Midnight 12.
Student congress tomorrow! Excited much, new people, new friends ;D

i was reading the rules for church camp on friday and found this ultra amusing one:

Males are not allowed to run around the premises bare bodied. No personnel are to proceed to the bathroom wrapped only in a towel for wash up and vice versa.

HAHA, I sorta can imagine the guys running around without their clothes on, HAHA since they are considered pretty open people, teehee :D

okay stelle should be sleeping nowww!
goodnight everyone

booogachaaxxzzz.
I'm back AGAIN from my native home, malaysia (:
today's All Souls' Day, may all the departed live happily up in heaven with God & RIP.
went in yesterday evening at around 7 plus, dined at this huge open air hawker-like place,
called Hongkong Boy, their Emperor's chicken was solid good.
Stayed over at Aunty Helen's house, got to see Jerm's two dogs, Didi & Meimei, HAHA.
I think they're pomeranians, but their barks are really sharp and ear-piercing.
This reminds me of going to Pet Safari @ Vivo the other day, I was just telling Janet that I think
any hamsters that come home with me will suffer because I'll think that they're so cute that I end up squeezing them too much or something hahaha SPCA alert! Nah, but I have a soft spot for dogs, especially this one that I saw there! Oh my goodness! It was SOOOOOO CUTE!!!! It was looking at me with those puppy eyes and playing around with it's tail! AHH I WANT A DOG. But parents won't allow it because they think that it's bad for my asthma ): i've outgrown already! I shall get one when I'm older (:
Yup, so early this morning we attended All Souls Day mass at the Church of St Joseph at Plentong, breakfast at some really nice fishball shop, then it was to Tampoi where my dearest
grandfather was buried at (; I think that his tombstone thing was like the nicest amongst all the others there hahaha ssshhhh, and you know we used to have these really exquisite porcelain angels that were glued to the tombstone, but some itchy hand idiot went to hack off their wings and crack Mary's statue. Sorry for the usuage of idiot there, but I just feel that you shouldnt do that to someone, especially since they're already dead. Anyways, we had a short prayer session where the Sisters ( My 9 Aunties ) did it the traditional way, which was in Teochew.
My grandfather looks charismatic HAHA. That's what I think (:
YAY! Mummy said that we might be going to Krabi ( Thailand ), on Dec 2 with Ashley and Godma's family!! I heard the beaches there are really beautiful, and the water is crystal clear
teehee, this is making me go happpyyy ;D
everyone's off to their own escapade now! Jerome's in Cambodia (: Haha how exotic, the mission trip should be really meaningful. Have a safe trip! (:
okay it's time for my taiwanese epi session, i've just started watching " It Started with a Kiss 2"
teehee, I dont usually watch Taiwanese shows but this seems nice!

toodles woodles!